(This one from my friend Yvonne) THERE'S A BURGLAR IN MY HOUSE! HOW DO I MAKE SURE THE POLICE COME QUICKLY (...because...I've heard...that sometimes...they don't)?
When you call, feel free to gloss over the fact there is a man in your living room trying to steal all your worldly belongings. For a faster response, mention your suspicion that someone is putting up a Falun Gong poster on your front door. When they arrive minutes later, you can just say you were mistaken.
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